How I Want to Identify Myself...

...is not how I've been acting. I want to be active, energetic, a clear athlete. When people see me, I want them to be able to tell that I appreciate my body, and am willing to spend time on it. If you aren't willing to spend the time on yourself, no matter how much, why should you expect anyone else to do the same? If you want the man with the bulky biceps or six pack, is that hypocritically that you do not try and treat your own body like a champion? We only get one, and we should treat it like our temple. People who have nice bodies, just look like they are in control-- of their lives, and their bodies. And I would love to have and maintain more control in my life. A contract to myself: -take care of yourself! -don't eat shit that you know it will make you feel like shit! -limit drinking, especially binge drinking on weekends -exercise! Be the girl who needs to exercise as a daily part of life, where it's not a dreaded situation to go to the gym. -if you're not completely satisfied when looking in the mirror, keep working. But understand that these things take time, and with commitment and dedication, it can happen. -maintain a positive work life balance, and try to remove stress and negative things from your mind. Goals: -workout 4x a week. -cook my lunches every Sunday night + freeze -complete lesson plans + busy work on Friday night + Saturday mornings - keep the weekends open! I've been working on a 30 min treadmill plan lately, and it includes a variance of speeds and inclines, to help work various muscles of the legs, while still creating a calorie burn from interval training. I also do 20 minutes of weights.

In Time for the Holidays...

I love rice crispy treats. No matter what you do, there's going to be a ton of sugar in them due to the marshmallows and a bit of fat from the butter. But you can tweak it a bit by using a different cereal! Go for a whole grain cereal, and one that's lower in sugar, to avoid any excess sugar. I like using Total cereal, because it not only has whole grains, but I'm getting my vitamins in while I'm treating myself!!

And, for the workout cheat of the day. During a commercial break prop yourself on the edge of the couch, straighten your legs, and raise them up and down, with your abs tight. When shampooing in the shower, try doing squats (be careful not to let your knees go past your ankles).

Mkkk.

So I'm back to 131 lbs. :) Went to the chiropractor today for what I thought would be a relaxing massage...holy crap...I have a swollen neck, so she was working on getting giant knots out of it. dinner tonight is going to be 500 calories... with a huge amount of bbq chicken breast, cooked broccoli + zucchini, and couscous.
55 grams of protein, only a total of 7 grams of fat.
(did you know couscous has 8 grams of protein a serving??)hooooray.

Yup.

I had my first workout since the accident last night. I did about 40 minutes of circuit training. Keeping light weights of course until I know what my body is capable of. Yesterday...let's see...what did I eat? I don't remember...other than my shishkabob dinner, so I guess I'll start with today!! haha.

breakfast: 1/2 cup cottage cheese, fresh fruit (pineapple), 2 egg whites, and sauteed veggies (peppers, onions) and meat from last night to make a breakfast scramble. about 300 calories.

The goal for today is to play some tennis before work! YAY.

Back on Track.

So the last post had been about not weighing myself. And, it actually did work. I had finally gotten back on track, was watching my eating, staying active, and starting to feel pretty good about it all! I weighed in on the first of May and had dropped down to 131 pounds even. A loss of a little over 3 pounds. Now, of course, it's unfortunate because I have put it all back on because of my car accident. I haven't been able to work for 3 weeks, or work out. Anddddd everyone knows how much I love to eat. :) So, beginning this week, I am hoping to get back on track again. As per request, I will also be putting my food logs on here...starting tomorrow, because I've had a random eating day today, even though I'll still stay on track for my calorie plans. But I don't recommend you to eat pasta and chicken for breakfast haha. SO YEAH. back to work tomorrow...and I will probably start working out again on wednesday! so We'll see how it goes! Good luck to everyone on their journeys, and I'm proud of those who have been making progress already!

Yup!

I'm not weighing myself in...which may stab me in the ass, but I'm takin a shot at it. I've now cut back to a 1600/day calorie diet, or less, and am working full time at safeway, (8hr a day, 5 days a week) and hitting the gym on my 2 days off. I do 30 minutes of interval training, and 30 minutes of weight training, particularly upper body. If this doesn't do something...I think my body hates me with a passion! lol. I want to be in top notch shape before I leave for Arizona, and hopefully it won't be as hard for maintenance this time around....

oops.

Ripped my pants today at work. Perhaps its time to get more serious about working out? Ohh...it's so difficult, I've tried so hard. :/

Progress Halted. And reversed. A LOT

But there are reasons...not that I'm one to make excuses...haha...I really wish I was able to upkeep my exercise program before Arizona, but 2 things have been my enemy for the past week and a half: TIME (huuuuge), and my possibly having diabetes. I am so behind in school work that I honestly can't afford to take the time to go to the gym for an hour. Writing this is like the most offtask I've been in a long time, so I'll keep it short. Also, I got ANOTHER blood test back, (yeah, still for the "mystery" illness), and the doctors have finally noticed a trend, and that is on my elevated blood glucose levels. So I checked the symptoms, and they all coincide, so I'm getting tested, again. I have been struggling to adjust my diet, as keeping it low carb is nearly impossible for me, especially in the aspect of the sugar department, and so I've had a lot of highs and lows lately. So by the end of the day, I just binge...because that entire day had sucked, and I know I can just sleep off any ill feelings from what I eat at night, instead of having to deal with it throughout my day. Backwards, right. Oh well...I will get to work out this weekend since I'm working at the gym, so that's good. :) only 8 days until arizona!! And my interview is tomorrow :) Wish me luck. BUSY BUSY BUSY!!!

Bit by Bit

Never really having to worry about losing weight in my life, this venture to drop 5-7 pounds for my competition has been an interesting journey. I have seen and experienced the struggle that many women go through, instead of barking the advice on the other side. Although I understand it is more difficult for me, because I have a smaller body (ie lower bmr), and I have always been fairly active. So unless I want to not eat anything, it's an extremely slow progress mark, maybe a half pound or less a week.

I hadn't let myself weigh in for the last 2 weeks because of the lack of results I was seeing, but yesterday was my first weigh in. Granted, the results were smaller than I had expected (I just want to get there already damn it!), but I have made progress. First weigh in:
Down 1 lb to 132.6
Down 1% body fat to 16.6%

For all of you people telling me I don't need to lose weight, keep in mind, I KNOW!:
1. I do not think I'm fat
2. I'm training for a bikini competition, whose focus is on muscular definition. I know the weight/body fat percentage required to have definition in my abs/other parts of my body. Once I get there, I'm stopping.
3. My goal is about 125 pounds, and 14.5% body fat.
4. and a more trivial reason: I can't afford to buy larger clothes, haha.

First, I wanted to be at goal by the middle of january, then my birthday (thursday), and then spring break. But I realize this isn't easy, especially with my extremely busy schedule!! But the ultimate goal is July 9th in Vancouver Washington. But ultimately I want to do it just for me :)

Hindered progress...I'll keep fighting

Since the return from Europe I had set the goal that I was going to get back to my original, pre-europe weight and body fat percentage. No such luck thus far. While I was making good progress for a while, my appetite and busy lifestyle got the best of me. I have the appetite of a lion, and was not tracking my food enough and using enough self control to contain my eating. I also began making excuses about how I as so busy and could not make it to the gym. Well. That's changing.
I have been on operation fitness consistently for about 3 weeks steady now, and I won't lie, the first week went good, dropping down to about 130 pounds, then the next week I was somehow up to 135 again, and then now, I haven't weighed myself in over a week, and don't plan on doing it for another couple of days. It's kind of liberating. I know I have been eating well, about 1800 calories a day, while walking 1-2 miles a day just while on campus, and another 4-5 miles worth on days that I work. Every week day I am not working in the evening I make a commitment to myself to go workout, even if it's just a 30 minute weight training routine. I am taking control of my body, because I'm tired of looking in the mirror and not liking what I see.
I took for granted the body I had created for myself before. It turns out, because of the high level of muscle I had, I had a rapid metabolism (which, by the way, any of you guys can get back...so dont you dare blame your age for it, just start weight training damn it!!!). And so I could get away with eating more before...I probably had about 2500-3000 calories a day I figure. But here I am now, struggling. But I know I can do it. Arms + abs are first on my list! lol. Weight training is so essential though, I keep telling myself I need to do it more, but then I run out of time, or just try and do class instead of lift. That will change.
Before, my goal was to be in bad ass shape by my birthday...thats only 9 days away though. I'll be realistic, and set myself a new goal, which is to be back to my old body by spring break, or when I leave for Arizona at least, which is March 16. Sooooo excited!!! :) Well I better get some shut eye...lots of homework to get done in the morning!! (oh thats the other thing...I've gotten an entirely different approach on my busy life, and am managing it all quite well! I don't feel nearly as stressed when I'm exercising regularly....yeah. eff you cortisol!!!)